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theatlantic:

Ignorify: The App That Wants to Help You Avoid the Physical World So You Can Keep Playing Angry Birds in Peace

You’re walking down the street, texting, listening to some music … and, without realizing it, you step into oncoming traffic. Or a fire hydrant. Or another person. 

The perils of distracted driving may be many, but so are the ones associated with distracted walking. Ignorify — acknowledging that “there’s no real reason to be bothered by our actual surroundings any longer” — is an app that wants to provide a solution. Specifically, by alerting texters and Instagrammers and ‘Angry Birds’-players to the physical objects (poles, potholes, dogs) that might impede their meanderings.

“My new app,” says the product’s inventor in the video above, “is something that solves an age-old problem and an annoyance for all of us in the tech industry: the real world.”

Indeed, sir. Indeed.

The new app is (clearly … and maybe just a little bit unfortunately?) a joke. But it’s a good one. Especially when you consider this extra bit of irony: There are actual apps out there that do pretty much what Ignorify is only pretending to.

I walked into a pole reding and walking so if only this app were real.